


The Last Straw

by vogue91



Category: Psych
Genre: Ficlet, Funny, Gen, POV First Person, Silly, Threats
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-07
Updated: 2018-03-07
Packaged: 2019-03-28 05:21:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13897125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: “Write it down, Gus! How many does this make it?” I shout. He pretends to think about it.“With this, I think we’re at thirty-two times he’s said he’ll make you pay.”





	The Last Straw

“Mr. Spencer, tell us, how did you realize the murderer was Mr. Thomas? He didn’t have any ties with the victim.” a journalist asks me, a fairly nice one. I smile, wink, and flaunt my press look.

“Well, for starters he was the victim son-in-law, even though they hadn’t spoken in years. And then...” I pause, for dramatic effect, to create suspense. “I’ve had a fundamental clue.” I bring my fingers to my head, mimicking a vision. I see Gus gesturing me to cut it, and Jules half-smiling. “Detective Lassiter didn’t believe he could be the perpetrator, so I was absolutely sure he was guilty!” I say, cheerful.

I see Lassie blushing furiously, and making those homicidal eyes he usually saves for me alone. I wave at him, and I get ready to run. As soon as the journalists go away, he gets closer.

“I swear Spencer, I will make you pay for this.” he hisses. I tilt my head, than address Gus.

“Write it down, Gus! How many does this make it?” I shout. He pretends to think about it.

“With this, I think we’re at thirty-two times he’s said he’ll make you pay.”

Jules let out a chuckle, and Lassie looks disgusted at her.

“You just can’t help but being so inappropriate, can you? That’s just what I needed, a public declaration!” he yells. I breathe in, close my eyes and let the breeze of half May brush my face. Then I open my eyes again and, as if come to a sudden revelation, I put my hands on his shoulders.

“Lassie. Try to understand. I love you man, you and I are a fantastic duo. But you have to get a better grip on your instincts.” I wave my hands in front of his face. “They pollute your aura.” I add, charming.

He clenches his teeth, then brings a hand to his holster.

“This is the day I’m gonna shoot you, Spencer.” he whispers. I turn to Gus.

“Man! What’s on our schedules for right now?” I ask.

“I think it’s...” he comes closer, than pulls on my arm. “Retreat!” we start running, Lassie chasing after us.

“Call you later, Jules! Don’t worry, I’ll try not to hurt your partner too much!” I tell the detective, who’s now laughing out loud.

“Come back here, Spencer! You can’t run forever!” I hear screaming behind me. I keep running, laughing.

Mocking Carlton Lassiter definitely makes the list of the ten funniest things in the whole world.  


End file.
